Adoption Day

On Wednesday May 18th, 2022, Carter was officially adopted. We arrived at the court build and went inside. When we got there my lawyer pulled me aside to tell me that they gave Mary a zoom link, because she wanted to object. I asked my lawyer if I should tell Carter as it will set him off for sure. The lawyer said I’m going to ask that if she gets on that they will clear the court room including Carter to deal with that matter.

Many friends were there to celebrate with us. I gave a couple of adults a heads up, this way if it happened they could help keep Carter calm.

We got called into the court room. The Judge came in and said that the adoption was moving forward. The Judge explained that we aren’t going to go through all the reasons as to why the adoption is taking place today. That if need be she will add to the record, to make sure it is all documented well. The Judge explained to my lawyer to ask me yes or no questions as my head was probably spinning from all the excitement. We all laughed a little bit. My lawyer started asking me questions. The Judge then said that no one in the back can hear you. She invited everyone to come up to the jury box so that they could hear better, The judge stated that if you all got up to be here their early you deserved to be closer. Everyone moved around so that they could hear. we thanked the Judge. My lawyer asked me a lot of questions and I answered them. Then the Judge addresses Carter. The Judge said you are under oath. Then she said as you sit here today is your bed made at home? Carter as needed yes. The judge asked did you do it? Carter answered yes. The Judge then said to me “You’re getting a great kid.” Then the Judge asked Carter if he wanted to be adopted, and he said yes. The judge asked if he understood the permanency of this? Carter said yes. The Judge said asked if he understood that there is potential things in the future with biological mom? Carter replied “Yes”. The judge asked “Are you okay with that?” Carter said Yes I am. The Judge then pointed to me and said she clear loved you very much. She also said that you have quite a lot of people here as well that love you. The Judge then stated you must not be a rotten kid. Everyone laughed. The Judge asked Carter if there was anything he wanted to say about this or why this is important. He said no. She asked him if he had any thoughts about what he wanted to do in the future. He said Marine biology. The Judge stated that she knew that, someone had mentioned that. She explained that if she didn’t do this that she wanted to do Marine Biology. She asked him if there was anything particular that he liked about that. Carter said yes I like marine life. She said to him that it’s a pleasure to meet you. The Judge then said that there has been a lot of legal stuff going on around this but that’s how it is right. The Judge continued saying even though you had the KLG there was a nuance difference right. The Judge then said that is something that you want right that extra layer. Carter replied Yes. The Judge said that is very understandable. The Judge then said I want to make something of a record here. This case has had a lot of ups and downs. She said she has been with this case since the beginning. She said we were prepared to do whatever we needed to do here today. The Judge continued “We wouldn’t have had a hearing today but if there were any issues we would have discussed it. The Judge then said as a Judge for the last 15 years I deal with children and families. She said that in that there is a purpose, and love, and adventure. She then said that in all her years she has never seen a case where the biological parents don’t love their biological children. She continued saying that sometimes things happen they can’t get their stuff together. Sometimes that is because they don’t have internal fortitude. Sometimes they have issues that aren’t their fault. Sometimes we can blames them oh your not doing things right. The judge continued let me tell you something no one wants to not be well and have a productive life, and I know from this file that this is clearly not about a lack of love. It’s about a lack of ability, and I think it’s important that you understand that. She explained that none of us are perfect no matter what age we are, we have mistakes and regrets but you are here for a reason right. She said that everyone had talked to her about Carter and that he is a wonderful young man, and how smart you are. The judge said I didn’t know how handsome you are but (saying to me) but you gotta watch out for that because that can be trouble. She then said in all seriousness I know you are a wonderful person, and you are going to do great things.

The Judge continued, I have to say this next part and it is hard to hear. You’re parents rights have been terminated, and Shelby will now be your parent. The judge stated that she is entering an order of adoption. I’m very grateful for that judge and her decisions in this matter.

We took pictures with everyone even the judge. It was a great day and we are so happy for the outcome. I will continue to post updates about our journey. While the adoption is final, our story isn’t finished yet.